Drive it like you stole it

Drive it like you stole it

I love this saying, because it makes absolutely no logical sense. For those unfamiliar, this saying is usually directed at someone driving a car who needs to do so in a more rapid manner than they currently are doing, ie they’re late for something, or trying to get away from someone or something.

This also implies that car thieves automatically drive fast. This isn’t always true, because that would cause undue attention directed at them. therefore they’d stick out like a sore thumb!! If you’d just stolen a car, would you actually drive around very fast, thus creating a spectacle? I didn’t think so. Granted, if being pursued by the police, a car thief might drive fast, but how often do those high-speed chases end up where the thief evades the police successfully and winds up with a free car?

I’ve seen enough cop shows on TV to know that catching car thieves is something cops are fairly good at, namely when involved in a chase. “Parked car theft” is a whole other story, equally as shitty, and even worse since there’s practically nothing to go on when the cops show up.

I don’t know what prompted me to write this all down, I just think it’s funny when someone says “OK man, drive it like you stole it” – if I heard that I’d drive normally, not because I wouldn’t drive fast if I’d actually stolen the thing, I’d just want to piss that person off.

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